"i'm a loser, baby..."

In the interest of full disclosure: I suck at blogging. I'm sure that comes to no surprise to many of my friends and family. I didn't used to be so bad at it...in fact, I believe the words "obsessive" and "overshare" were probably attributed to me on more than one occasion. But that was back in college and shortly thereafter. You know, before that so-called real life crap with it's career, responsibilities and all that came into play. I am still very firmly convinced that if I wasn't employed in an industry that demanded so much creative writing, I wouldn't find it such a chore to do it for pleasure.

Now that we've gotten that out of the way...

Can I just say that so far 2011 hasn't been all that kind to me? Stomach flu, sinus infections, pinkeye (seriously...pinkeye!) and other health hazards have been coming at me nonstop. Now it seems I'm having run-ins with household appliances, such as my water heater. Never underestimate the importance of hot water availability. An ass-kickin' workload and the additional freakazoid stress of wedding planning haven't exactly helped. I've always been a big believer in the adage, The will of God will never take you where the grace of God will not protect you." Which basically means that He knows what you can and can't handle, so if the cards are dealt your way, you should assume He has that much faith in you...have some faith in Him, too. That's easier said than done when standing underneath an icy morning shower with eyes reminiscent of Natalie Portman in Black Swan. But I'm hangin' in there and celebrating small victories wherever they may appear.

And big victories, too, like the fact that after I weighed in this morning I officially hit the 50-pound mark. That's right - I am now 50 pounds lighter than I was at my heaviest point. I've learned throughout my "stop being such a fatass" journey that weight loss is very rarely ever completely downward. You'll have some small gains here and there, and that can't be helped. You have to look at it from an overall perspective and if, in general, you're losing weight over time, then that's a wonderful thing! Fifty pounds is a pretty substantial milestone, and although I'm frustrated that none of my clothes fit (too big) and I can't really afford to supplement my wardrobe with ones that do (too broke), I'm happy that I can look back at old photos and say, "So long, Chubs!"

Speaking of weight loss, I decided to give up desserts, i.e. cookies, cakes and pie, for Lent. Nine days in and I would seriously clobber someone for a cupcake right about now. Lucky for me that Lent ends approximately six days before my wedding. So don't be surprised when I take a flying leap at the monstrously large cake we ordered...at that point I'll be in monster mode. I've supplemented with sugar-free pudding cups and fruit. Sooooo not the same, I'll tell you.

Well hopefully this binge session of blogging will ease my mind about the long dry period since my last entry. Given the short amount of time left between now and the wedding, though, I won't hold my breath.